When Should You Tell People You Are Pregnant?

image001So you’re pregnant – congratulations! This is one of the most wonderful times of your life, and you probably want to share the great news with everyone as soon as possible. In fact, you might be savoring the anticipation and looking at the calendar, wondering when it might be the right time for the great reveal.

This is not an announcement to be taken lightly. Read on for several ideas on how to tell those who matter most to you, and especially the answer to the big question of when should you tell people you are pregnant.

When Should You Tell People You Are Pregnant?

It can be very tempting to shout the news from the rooftops right after you get that positive pregnancy test. But many women hold off until they have figured a few things out – especially how they feel about the situation. For some, a pregnancy might be unexpected, or it might be under difficult circumstances. In those cases, waiting a bit and getting used to the idea of pregnancy before you tell others makes perfect sense.

Wait Untill the Pregnancy Is Stable

Other women choose to wait until after that first ultrasound, the one that confirms everything looks good so far. That’s because many miscarriages happen during the first three months of pregnancy, and the last thing you want to deal with is the euphoria of friends and family, followed by the devastation that everyone is sure to feel if you do miscarry. For that reason, many women wait until they are past the three-month mark to make the news public.

How Does Your Family See This?

It can also be a tough call to make because some of your extended family might not welcome the pregnancy. This might be the case if you are in a relationship that your family doesn’t approve of, or maybe you aren’t in a relationship at all – the baby is an “oops” situation that you have decided you want to keep. Be prepared for any situation that might arise when you spill the beans.

Only Pop the News When You Are Ready

The most important thing is to tell when you are ready, and not before. You might want to share the news with someone close, such as your parents, who will be able to keep a secret and will be very supportive if things don’t go as planned. And besides, it helps to have someone outside of yourself and your partner to share the excitement with!

Who to Tell First?

When it’s time to tell other people, make sure that you inform those who matter most first. For instance, give your best friend a call well before you put that public blast on Facebook! When it comes to your workplace, makes sure your boss knows before anyone else does. That’s just common courtesy.

How to Tell People You’re Pregnant

Now that you’ve decided when to tell people you are pregnant, the fun begins – it’s time to make the announcement! At this point it’s safe to say that your partner is aware of the situation. An intimate conversation should do the trick, and then you can both plan how to tell others. Diving into telling everyone is a moment you will remember forever, and they will too, so make it a memorable one!

Step 1: Tell Your Loved Ones

Always tell your loved ones before you go public with the news. This includes parents, siblings, friends and other people who are close to you. Most of them will want to hear the news privately, straight from you. So make sure that you let them know with a phone call, a visit or some other way that will truly matter to them. You can make it formal or make it cute, or mix it up for each person. Just make sure they are sworn to secrecy until you have had a chance to tell everyone else on your short list of loved ones who needs to know.

Step 2: Tell Your Boss and Then Your Co-workers

As mentioned before, tell your boss before you tell your coworkers. The last thing you want is for your boss to find out later, and then wonder why he or she wasn’t told at the start. Make sure that you are aware of your company’s maternal leave policy, so you and your boss can have a discussion about your role and how long you might be gone. Even if your boss wants to just congratulate you and offer a sweet toast at the office luncheon, the topic of leave will be brought up eventually, so be prepared for that.

Step 3: Tell the Public—Maybe a Facebook Update

Once your boss knows, tell your coworkers, and then spill the beans to everyone else. Once it’s out there, remember that anyone can find out, so make sure you have told all those close to you before the big, ultimate public reveal. You can share your photos and excitement in the social network!

How did others announce their pregnancies? Here are some great examples:

“We chose to tell my husband’ s best friend and my best friend immediately. Fortunately, they already had kids of their own and they each knew to keep things quiet. And they lived far away and had very limited contact with other members of our families, so it meant that the secret was kept, but we had someone to talk to about it. It worked out great!”

“We had a great opportunity to tell everyone at the family reunion. I was four months along and we chose to pull aside those who needed to know first, like my mother, and then my sister, and then her husband, too. Then we told everyone else that night around the campfire. The next morning, we called my husband’s family and told them – parents, then siblings, then everyone else. It was a great way to spread the word.”

“I told my best friend, then told her to tell everyone she knew. She was more than happy to be the bearer of very happy (and true!) gossip. And it took the pressure off me to tell everyone.”

“We started up a blog and then invited family and friends to view it. When they logged on, they got a surprise of the sonogram picture on the blog’s front page! It caused quite a stir, and the comments were all bursting with happiness. It was also a nice reminder that we will be able to keep for our son to read when he’s older.”

Want to break the news in a hilarious way? This video can help: