Delayed ejaculation or having difficulty ejaculating isn’t usually a problem if two people don’t mind how long ejaculation takes. Most of the time, men who take longer than average and both people enjoy longer sex, this isn’t really an issue at all.
Some men do mind if it takes longer than normal to ejaculate and their partner may get tired or frustrated. The root of difficulty in ejaculating most often lies in the mind and learning some mental techniques can actually help speed things up a bit.
What Is Delayed Ejaculation?
Delayed ejaculation, also known as (DE) or impaired ejaculation, is when it takes a man longer to reach orgasm. Men will experience difficulty in ejaculating when they encounter the DE. There are even some men who never ejaculate. While this can happen to any man once in a while, some may have issues with it their entire life.
Having difficulty ejaculating doesn’t have any serious effects on health, but it can cause mental and emotional issues or problems with relationships. The good news is there are treatments to help this condition. Just discuss the issue with your doctor and they can help find a treatment that is right for you.
What Causes Delayed Ejaculation?
- Congenital defects and abnormalities
- Injury to nerves that bring on orgasm
- Heart conditions
- Neurological conditions
- Hormone conditions i.e. low thyroid hormones or low testosterone level
- Infections i.e. urinary tract, prostate infections
- Prostate procedures or surgeriey
- Mental health issues i.e. PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), anxiety, depression
- Sexual performance anxieties
- Unable to differentiate between sexual fantasy and real life partner
- Strong religious or cultural values regarding sex
- Relationship issues, stress, lack of communication
Medications or Substance Use
- Blood pressure medicines
- Diuretic medications
- Excessive alcohol use
In some, just a small physical illness may cause a temporary delayed ejaculation. This can trigger an anxiety reaction during the next sexual encounter about the previous episode and then delayed ejaculation can become chronic due to the anxiety.
When Should You Consult a Physician?
If you experience delayed ejaculation or having difficulty ejaculating and you think you may have an issue, call your doctor for help if:
- You think you may have a health condition or medication causing the problem.
- It is causing trouble between you and your partner
- Symptoms that accompanies delayed ejaculation i.e. burning with urination, etc.
How to Diagnose Delayed Ejaculation
Doctors may begin by looking for physical problems that may be the root cause:
A Physical Examination. Your doctor may check your reproductive organs to see if you have any structural abnormalities or sensitivity issues.
Blood Testing. Blood may be taken to check for diabetes, heart conditions, low testosterone, prostate disease or other health issues that may cause delayed ejaculation.
Urinalysis. A sample of urine might be needed to look for excess sugar in the urine (diabetes), urinary tract infections or other health problems.
How to Treat Delayed Ejaculation
What You and Your Partner Can Do
Keeping a positive outlook about sex and your reproductive organs can help you prevent delayed ejaculation. You need to understand that responding to sexual pleasure can’t be forced. The more you try to force ejaculation, the more your body will resist.
In order to relieve the pressure, try to relax and allow yourself to be in the moment and feel good. Try not to think about ejaculation and ask your partner to relax and feel good with you. Learn to talk to your partner about your sexual relationship in an open an honest way.
There are some prescription medications that can help with delayed ejaculation. Also, if you are on a medication that may be causing this your doctor may be able to change or lower the dosage of your medicine. The medications that are used are not actually for this condition, but some of their effects may help:
- Cyproheptadine – This is an allergy medication
- Amantadine – This is a drug used for Parkinson’s disease
- Buspirone – This medication is used to treat anxiety
If your doctor cannot find a physical cause for delayed ejaculation, you may need to seek psychological therapy to find the cause of the issue. Problems that may be addressed includeanxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and underlying anxiety related to delayed ejaculation.
Your therapist may also want to see your partner to help address any relationship issues that may be causing the problem. You may also be referred to a sex therapist that specializes in sexual dysfunction issues.
When Nothing Works
After a thorough work-up with your doctor and treatment, if you can still not ejaculate inside your partner and you want to have children, there is still help. You can try these other options:
- In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) – Some of your sperm and your partner’s egg can be fertilizedand implanted back into your partner.
- Artificial Insemination – Doctors can use a tube to inject your sperm into your partner during her most fertile time.
- Self-Insemination – It is possible to masturbate to obtain semen and place it inside your partner. A word of caution, do not use anything sharp to place semen in a woman’s vagina. This can cause injury. You can find helpful information on how to self-inseminate safely and successfully.
The following video explains more on delayed ejaculation:
Issues Other Than Delayed Ejaculation
Delayed ejaculation is not the only sexual problem men experience. Two other issues; premature ejaculation and retrograde ejaculation can also cause men distress.
In premature ejaculation men tend to ejaculate quickly and need their erection to last longer in order to pleasure their partner adequately. According to a study by the National Health and Social Life Survey, Sociologist Edward Laumann, PhD, states “one-third of American men complain that they ejaculate too quickly.” This issue can also cause emotional and relationship issues.
Another ejaculation issue that isn’t as common as the others is known as retrograde ejaculation. When ejaculation happens, the semen is pushed up inside the bladder upon orgasm and not out the tip of the penis. It is harmless and comes out upon urination.